Commentator: Josh Matthews & John “Bradshaw” Layfield
Championship’s roll call: WWE Champion: CM Punk… World Champion: Sheamus… Intercontinental Champion: The Miz… United States Champion: Antonio Cesaro… Tag Team Champions: Team Hell No… NXT Championship: Seth Rollins… Diva’s Champion: Eve Torres
Booker T opens the show, sucka. He talks about Big Show facing Sheamus and discusses a BIG QUESTION burning which finisher is deadlier: the Brogue Kick or the WMD? At the top of the stage is the Punch-O-Meter that the WWE used to use in the NXT challenges. Booker brings Show and Sheamus out. Each of them gets one shot on the machine. Booker mentions that a boxer has a punch about 776 pounds per square inch. He allows Show to go first. He begins to get upset and grabs the mic and yells at the crowd for booing him. He rambles about knocking out Undertaker, John Cena and Randy Orton. Sheamus says he’ll go first and Brogue Kicks the machine to the tune of 1,322 pounds per square inch. Show still refuses and thinks the machine is gimmicked. Sheamus goads him into it by taunting him about the Brogue beings stronger than the WMD. He moves onto making fun of his title reign length so Show casually punches the machine and rings up 1,809 pounds per square inch. Sheamus is impressed but gets attacked from behind by Tensai. Booker tosses his ass outta there. 6/10 I enjoyed that; it was simple and to the point and shut Sheamus up. We move right onto this obvious match…
Sheamus vs. Tensai: Sheamus is already in the ring and Tensai gets an entrance; they brawl on the floor and Sheamus tosses Tensai into the barricade. Tensai battle back but gets sent into the post. Back in the ring, the bell rings and Sheamus is on the attack. He hits a corner clothesline. Sheamus tries a running knee but Tensai hits an elbow to the face and the crowd is silent. Sheamus fires back with a chop block like move. He hits a pair of shoulderblocks in the corner but Tensai explodes with a clothesline. He tries a suplex but Sheamus reverses it. The Locomotive in the corner misses and Sheamus’ Irish Hammer comeback begins. Shoulderblocks in the corner set up a running kneelift and powers him up into a powerslam. Tensai mounts a brief comeback and hits a Vader Splash he misses the running senton. Sheamus gets him up in White Noise (which is impressive); the Brogue Kick follows for the pinfall. 5.5/10 Pretty entertaining big man match as they both let as much hang out as they could in the short time allotted. For what it was it was good. I could live with an extended feud between these two.
Here is your winner… Sheamus @ about 6:15 via Brogue Kick pinfall.
We see the entire WWE.com exclusive footage of Alberto Del Rio attacking Randy Orton at the close of SmackDown two weeks ago. Back in their locker room, Ricardo Rodriguez is nervous about Orton in the building. ADR is nonplused; he feels that Orton’s Twitter threat was BS so he sends Ricardo out to search for the Viper. When we return from break Ricardo is searching for Orton… but runs into a different snake, the Cobra. Santino Marella scares the crap out of him with it. Marella tells him he needs to worry about Randy’s RKO and strikes him with the Cobra.
Santino Marella & Zack Ryder vs. Heath Slater & Jinder Mahal (w/Drew McIntyre): Pre-match, McIntyre calls the beat down from Raw beautiful music. Mahal mentions that they are unified as “The Band”… BABY! Slater added the baby part. They air guitar together until Team Co-Bro’s music interrupts. Ryder wins Paper Rock Scissors and starts with Mahal; Ryder runs the ropes and hits a faceplant and a dropkick. Marella gets a tag and thinks about the top rope but settles for the first rope jumping sledge (it’s much safer). Santino works the arm so Mahal punches him in the mouth. Marella comes right back with the split legged hiptoss and goes for the Salute head-butt but Heath distracts him briefly so he misses it. Mahal hits him with a clothesline and tags in Slater. He pops Marella with a punch to the face and the Band works over him in the corner with stomps, baby! Slater misses a clothesline and Marella rolls to a tag… but whiffs and Slater takes back control with a rolling front facelock. He turns it into a chinlock until Santino breaks free and hits a split-legged stunner. Marella crawls to the wrong corner this time but eventually finds the right one and here come Ryder. Zack hits some clotheslines of his own and a missile dropkick. The Broski Boot follows but Mahal interferes. Marella runs in but gets sidestepped and sent to the floor; Ryder wipes Jinder out with a clothesline but Drew distracts. Ryder turns right into the E Minor and gets pinned. Post-match, the Band celebrates with some air guitar. 5/10 That was fun. I like the Band and it is good to see these three guys, who were floundering in nowheresville, get some sort of push. Slater has been growing on me since his “reverse legend killer” gimmick leading up to Raw 1000. Mahal is okay and McIntyre has been doing zilch since he got beat up by Tiffany a few years ago.
Here are your winners… The Band @ about
Kane vs. Dolph Ziggler (w/Vickie Guerrero): Apparently, Ziggler challenged Kane via Tout since he got embarrassed on Raw by them. Dolph goes behind but Kane tires a gutwrench and Ziggler lands on his feet. He gets a boot in but charges right into an uppercut. Dolph slides to the apron to break momentum. Back in the ring, Dolph tries to maul Kane in the corner but gets caught with a near powerslam but Dolph tenaciously slips free. He keeps on Kane with running fists; Kane tosses him over the top and Ziggler half-skins-the-cat back in so Kane boots him to the floor. Dolph takes an unnecessary over-the-top bump as we head to break. We return with Kane kneeing the crap out of Dolph in the corner. Ziggler floats over in the corner but winds up on the apron again. He seizes the moment hanging Kane’s throat off the top but does not seize it enough because he quickly gets caught in a goozle leaping off the top. Dolph frees himself and hits the Namedropper, for two. They trade blows with Kane winning that battle. Kane mistakenly drops his head for a backdrop allowing Ziggler a swinging neckbreaker. Dolph lands a series of about ten elbows and concludes with the Showoff Elbow. Dolph puts on a front facelock and Kane powers free; Ziggler keeps him at bay with a dropkick. He misses a Stinger Splash in the comer and takes a Hennig there. Kane clobbers him with a running clothesline and low dropkick for a pair of nearfalls. He hits a corner clotheslines and then one cross-corner; the side slam gets two more. Kane casualty heads to the top allowing Ziggler a crotching counter. He punches Kane in the fruit rollup and joins him on the top; Kane shoves him off so Vickie pops up on the apron. Ziggler grabs the MitB briefcase and waffles Kane with it. The ref catches him and promptly DQs him. Post-match, Dolph tries to attack him with the briefcase but Kane makes his own save. Daniel Bryan shows up after the fact and claims he “saved Kane”. Matt Striker rushes into the ring with a mic and asks them if the bickering will cost them the title. He then asks Bryan if he is the weak link of the team… so Bryan puts him in the No Lock. Kane yells at him to break it and eventually grabs his ridiculous beard to physically pull him off Striker… so Kane can chokeslam him. Bryan stops him and they get into a “no/yes” argument and it pumps Kane into the hitting the chokeslam on poor Matt Striker. 7.5/10 Match was good despite the DQ ending; the post-match stuff was better. Dolph is like the main event version of Tyson Kidd, makes everyone look good but always does the job; hopefully, he can eventually recover from job duty and can stay afloat in the WWE title picture. I know he’s the MitB winner but he still never wins.
Here is your winner… Kane @ about 9:15 via DQ.
Ricardo Rodriguez continues his search for Randy Orton and hears his voice behind a door. He barges in on Hornswoggle playing with a Brawling Buddy. Ricardo freaks out on the toy and leaves.
We get clips of The Miz getting embarrassed by Larry King and Kofi Kingston from Raw, which leads to…
Kofi Kingston vs. Big Show: The Miz is on commentary. Well, Kofi has about 0% chance of winning here. Kofi tries kicks and speed to avoid the power but eventually fells to a shoulderblock. Kingston retreats to the floor; Show PALMS him back into the ring but Kingston is once again too quick with his kicks. He tries a springboard move but just bounces off Show and splats on the mat. He chops Kofi in the ropes. Show takes FOREVER capitalizing and Kingston blocks a corner charge with a boot. He dazzles Show with a pendulum kick and finally accomplishes a mammoth task, knocking the giant off his feet, with a missile dropkick. The Boom Drop follows but Show blocks Trouble in Paradise with one hand and knocks Kofi out with the WMD. Show HOOKS THE LEG for three. Post-match, the Miz grabs a mic and taunts Kofi. He says, as always, Kofi comes up a little short. He says he’ll beat Kingston at Main Event next week because he’s awesome. 3/10 Total destruction for Show as he continues to squash everyone in his path not names Sheamus; the guy PINNED Randy Orton, twice, in two straight matches, what change really did Kofi have here? The post-match stuff promotes the WWE Main Event IC title match, though so it’s not a total loss.
Here is your winner… Big Show @ about 4:00 via WMD pinfall.
The WWE shows a poll from WWE.com, which I think is doctored, whether CM Punk should choose John Cena or Ryback at HITC. The poll is split 50/50. I don’t believe that. Elsewhere, Ricardo Rodriguez reports to his boss. Alberto Del Rio gets annoyed but then freaked out by a methodically moving shadow… which turns out to be Daniel Bryan. Bryan says, “Expecting someone else?” Del Rio says he was expecting a little snake but got a goat. Bryan says he is a G.O.A.T.: as in “Greatest Of All Time”. That is a clever way to counter that insult. Del Rio says that the only reason he’s part of the tag champions is because of Kane. Bryan retorts, the only reason you’re still talking is because Randy Orton hasn’t found him yet. Bryan informs him that they have a match tonight. Oh, and “I’m the tag team champions.” Meanwhile, in Booker T’s office, Layla, Kaitlyn, and her boobs talk to Booker regarding the Eve Torres situation. Layla claims to have found a blonde wig after the attack but they are both talking at the same time so we can’t fully grasp what they’re saying. Teddy Long clarifies that Aksana found a blonde wig in Eve’s bag. Torres shows up and defends herself. Eve says that she found a blonde wig in Teddy’s bag and the ladies get into a fight. Booker takes the babyfaces away. Long admits he had nothing to with it. Eve says, “Neither did I.”
Sin Cara vs. Damien Sandow (w/Cody Rhodes): Here’s a good way to preview the number one contender’s finals on Raw this Monday. Ugh, here’s one good thing about Cara in a tag team, no stupid Sin Cara lighting, as we get here. Sandow pushes Cara around and yells at him in the corner. Cara nips up and kicks the snot out of him. He gets that top rope twirling armdrag move and Damien heads to the floor. Back in the ring, Sandow regains his composure and stomps the garbage out of Cara in the corner. He hits the Russian leg sweep and Cubito Aequet, for two. Sin Cara counters a tilt-a-whirl move with a jawjacker and gets more kicks in; he moves onto fisticuffs and the handspring elbow. A lassoing hurracanrana follows; Damien retreats to the apron so Cara Jerichos him off with a springboard dropkick. Cara leaps off the top but Sandow runs away and Cody takes the bullet in the form of a crossbody. Back on the apron, Cara hits a pendulum kick but Cody grabs his ankle, pulls him to the floor, whilst the ref is distracted with Sandow. The referee realizes what may have just happened, so in lieu of disqualifying Sandow, he ejects Rhodes from ringside. Good call. While Sandow is arguing with the ref, Cara springboards OVER the referee into a hurracanrana cradle and gets the three. Rhodes was halfway up the ramp by the time that happened, runs back into the ring, but Cara is already gone (up the ramp to celebrate). 6.5/10 Short, sweet and to the point; I like that ending with the referee and the underdog taking the advantage when he could to get a win over a much stronger superstar. As I mentioned earlier, this is a good way to promote the finals to the tourney on Monday. Only problem was where was Rey Mysterio? His absence makes the Luchadore team look less unified.
Here is your winner… Sin Cara @ about 6:45 via springboard hurracanrana cradle pinfall.
Daniel Bryan vs. Alberto Del Rio (w/Ricardo Rodriguez): They lock up and Del Rio kicks him in the corner; Bryan comes back with Euro uppercuts. He gets Alberto down and hits a No Kick for two. Del Rio fires back with a savate kick and chokes Daniel in the corner with his boot. A short suplex nets two. Alberto misses a corner charge and eats a bunch of No Kicks; he slaps on the surfboard leg breaker. JBL calls Bryan a “good looking goat”. Funny. A bunch of No Kicks in the corner leads to a cross-corner whip reversal; Bryan flips off the top and hits the running Hart Attack. Fans chant “yes” driving Bryan crazy and he begins the No Kick sequence in the middle of the ring, allowing the fans to chant “yes” with him. The running No Trembler scores but the running No Dropkick in the corner does not. Del Rio hits a step-up enziguri to the arm and shoulder; JBL mentions he works towards his big move, the cross-armbreaker. ADR tries a running straddle in the ropes but Bryan moves; Del Rio hangs onto the top rope so Daniel kicks him free and he tumbles to the floor. Bryan tries the knee off the apron but Del Rio sidesteps him and tosses him, shoulder first, into the ring barricade. Here would be a good point to take a commercial. When we return, Bryan runs afoul of a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker, for two. ADR kicks away on the arm and keylocks it. Josh Matthews runs through ADR’s pedigree; it’s a good this he does not use it as a finisher or else he’d be fired. Bryan fights back and the two of them go through a great reversal sequence. Tilt-a-whirl, countered. Roundhouse No Kick, countered. Cross-armbreaker, countered. Bryan eventually succeeds with the No Lock but Ricardo pops up onto the apron to distract the referee. ADR struggles and… eventually makes the ropes with one finger. Del Rio rolls to the apron and applies a ring-rope cross-armbreaker! That’s new. He breaks on four despite having ‘till FIVE. Back in the ring, ADR shoots Bryan into the turnbuckles, posting his shoulder, and here’s the cross-armbreaker. Bryan TAPS OUT. Dammit. Well the WWE wants ADR kept strong. 6/10 Good main event. The only thing I do not like here is Del Rio survived the No Lock and Bryan taps out instantly. He and Bryan worked a great mental chess match and Del Rio came out on top; I get it Bryan is a tag wrestler now, but why is it an automatic job to a singles wrestler ALL of the time? Oh, well, I liked the in-ring work but the result… not so much.
Here is your winner… Alberto Del Rio @ about 12:15 (broadcast) via cross-armbreaker submission.
After the main event Alberto Del Rio grabs the mic to address the “roomors” of Randy Orton showing up. He claims that the Viper is not there because of this reason. Clips from the post-SmackDown beat down are shown again along with Orton jobbing to Big Show on WWE Main Event. ADR declares himself the new “ah-pex predator” in the WWE. He calls him a garden snake and has no cojones. He runs his mouth some more and mocks the Orton pose; he drops down into the Viper up sequence but Orton is waiting in the grass and meets him eye-to-eye. Randy delivers the receipt from two weeks ago and kicks the garbage out of ADR on the floor. He posts him a few times and dismantles the announce table. Orton tries the Viper DDT off the announce table but Ricardo finally makes his presence known and breaks it up. ADR runs away leaving poor Ricardo to take an RKO on the announce table. The table does not break, by the way. 4.5/10 I’m guessing this leads to ADR/Orton in the Cell. I assume Del Rio escapes with his life since Orton is going to take some time off to film a movie and when he returns, wants to be a heel. Long term booking says Sheamus/Orton into the Rumble or WrestleMania (which would be much better).
OVERALL 7/10 I really enjoyed this show; there was nothing that was total garbage They promoted all of the upcoming PPV matches well and even pimped some Raw matches as well. The three weeks of Sheamus/Show build is already oodles more entertaining than four months of Sheamus/Del Rio. Good show this week.